Refried Neurons

My best friend lives in New Zealand, and I’m a Londoner—well, not born and bred, but after 10 years in the city, I think I’ve earned the right to call myself one. I’d been planning a trip to visit M for a while, and when the opportunity finally came, I gave her a call, only to hear that, honestly, she didn’t want to spend her holiday in New Zealand. She’s seen it all, and, to be fair, would rather go somewhere else.

Without too much thought or even looking at a map, we decided that Chile seemed like a decent halfway point, so why not? M’s little cousin had spent last year driving across Patagonia and loved it. Plus, haven’t we all heard of Patagonia? It’s one of those bucket-list hiking destinations alongside the Himalayas and New Zealand. At least that’s how my list goes.

Most people spend ages planning their trips to Patagonia, booking hotels and tours well in advance. Not us! Our plan was simple: buy flights to Santiago, meet there, stay two nights, then fly to Punta Arenas, rent a car, and return it in 12 days. Sorted. After all, it’s Patagonia, there has to be plenty of places to stay, right? Three days before the flight, I booked a hotel in Santiago, and M booked us one night in Puerto Natales. And that was the extent of our planning.

My lovely partner, who wasn’t coming with us, bought me a tourist guide to Patagonia, which I did open—once, in London, just to check where Punta Arenas is. Looking back, I probably should’ve read the “Important Information” chapter, but I’ll get to that later. The one thing I did check properly was visa requirements. As someone with dual nationality (Polish and British), I always have to check both countries’ regulations to make sure I’m good to travel.

We knew we wanted to do some hiking, so I prepped a little—re-waterproofed my hiking boots and even cleaned them for the first time in… well, who knows how long. I also went shopping with my London friend, Anna, who’s originally from Venezuela. We hit the outdoor shops in Covent Garden, which is a bit of a challenge sober with all the crowds. So, we tackled it the London way—shop, pub, shop, pub. Anna bless her, was terrified for us. Two girls, neither of whom speaks Spanish, heading to South America alone!

Despite all the drinking, the shopping was a success. I picked up some hiking socks, a lovely new merino base layer, and two trendy Uniqlo kidney bags—one for me and one for M. Apparently, they’re super fashionable. My other friend, who’s a fashion buyer, told me they even made it into Vogue! Anna also gave me a super practical gift: a water bottle with a built-in UV light to kill all the nasties. Handy, right?

A few days later, I packed my hand luggage and off I went! Yes, you read that right—hand luggage only for the whole trip. Since COVID and the nightmare of lost baggage at airports like Amsterdam, I’ve switched to traveling light. I’ve realized I don’t need much. Every trip, I come back with half my clothes unworn anyway. Plus, we planned to do laundry along the way.

My first stop was São Paulo. Well, technically. I stepped foot in Brazil for two hours but never left the airport—does that count? To be honest, thank goodness it was only two hours because the airport was dull and grey, not at all what I expected from such a colorful country.

On the flight to São Paulo, I met a lovely Norwegian woman on her way to a yoga retreat, and we had a nice chat that helped pass the time. The next leg, from Brazil to Chile, was shorter, and I ended up talking to a group of Brazilians from Belo Horizonte who were also headed to Patagonia. It was their first hiking trip, and all their gear was brand new. They were absolutely shocked that we hadn’t planned anything beyond our flights and a hotel or two!